Voice Lessons From A Sociopath

Yes, I know that change is a necessary evil, but that doesn't make it any less scary.  And yes, if you've ever taken a lesson from me, you know I spend a good portion of every lesson trying to “gently” (depending on who's telling the story, lol) lead my students out of their comfort zones and encourage them to try new things. It's kind of part of my job. A big part.

But, if I'm totally honest with myself, I'll admit that change terrifies me, so I get it. When students know they’re good at something, it makes total sense to keep doing what works, right?  Why rock the boat? Who knows what will happen? Teenagers can be brutal, high school can suck, and fear of the unknown is a real thing. 

Then there's Ryder. I absolutely encouraged this young man to try musical theater and audition for his high school show. I’m going to own that. And he absolutely said “no” for good reason. He’s got an active gigging schedule singing R&B and jazz. He knows what works, so needless to say, he was not hot to adopt my unwelcomed and out-of-the-blue suggestion. "I don't act, I don't dance. That's not my style of music." All valid points, and yet, as his voice teacher, I knew his voice could totally do it. He’s comfortable on stage, and theater is such a team sport! Everyone works together for months, and when the curtain closes... man, what a feeling! Suffice it to say that Ryder wasn’t having it no matter what I said. 

So then, imagine my surprise when Ryder announces he's auditioning for his high school’s production of "Little Shop of Horrors." I’m shocked. I’m ecstatic! He preps for the audition and nails it- Woo hoo!! This is fantastic! Then he gets The Dentist, and I think, ohhhhhh shit. What have I thrown this kid into? The character is a sick, sadistic psychopath who beats his girlfriend but has enough charm to provide “comic relief” in the show. Now what? Maybe not the best first roll for a high schooler dipping his toe into the musical theater pool. Still a good idea, Hilerie?  

"When I started," Ryder told me, "I was freaking out. I was like, I can NOT do this. I was forgetting lines all the time. I just couldn't get past the mental block and wasn't practicing enough." So what did he do? Ryder jumped in with both feet. He watched every performance he could find, channeling Patrick Bateman from American Psycho with an Elvis twang. He upped his vocal practice, working on support techniques to widen his range and increase his power. It was a wonder to behold. 

“It all came together. I was on stage with the lighting, then they added the band, and I was locked in. We started with professional musicians, then added the student pit orchestra, and it got even better. I’ve played with bands, but this was completely different because I could do my own thing on stage. The band energized me and helped me channel the song, the character, and the emotion. In the past, I’ve had a hard time moving and working with the audience, but this experience made me a better performer. The more over-the-top you go, the better it is. It doesn’t really matter anymore. You’re not yourself on the stage, you’re someone else.  So you don’t have to worry.”

Friends, sometimes I just say stuff.  I assume the thoughts that come up need to be said, but full disclosure? Very often, I am just as surprised as my students are at the things that come out of my mouth. And if I worried about Ryder being in a musical, Ryder MUST have worried about Ryder being in a musical. But I’ve done this long enough to know that nothing is ever as it seems and to let it all play out. Ha! Literally! 

Ryder tried on the new idea, then went for it. Then he tried on LOTS of new ideas, like costumes, makeup, lighting, and a full-out sociopath. He put it on, wore it, got up in front of his whole school, and did it! It’s crazy when I actually think about it. But then again, maybe that’s the point.  

Maybe the less we think, the better. Maybe we spend too much time making decisions with our brains instead of our gut. Sure, we can come up with a million good reasons not to do anything, but is that why we’re here? To do nothing? What if the courage comes once we take that step into the unknown? We commit to being the crazy dentist, singing in a whole new style in front of brand-new people, and that’s when things start to open up.

Now, if your gut is saying, “hell no!,” then listen for sure! But once you’ve let the dust settle, like Ryder, the words may change to “well, maybe…”  And even though it seems like our voice doesn’t know how to do all that new stuff, sometimes our intuition knows better and ultimately is the only voice that matters. That little Voice that says “jump” just might know you can fly. And yes, it could be terrifying, and you could fall, but that’s the test, right? Maybe that’s Ryder’s lesson here. Maybe that’s mine too. Either way, I know courage when I see it, and sometimes it absolutely looks like a crazy singing dentist.